reality is hitting me hard...
four years...
such a significant number
such a scary number
it can go by fast
it can go by slow

in four years
ill probably be in a place
where i dont know anyone
where i'll try to earn as much money as possible
in four years
i wont be here anymore
this house
this town

its not my friends
its not the strangers
its those the closest to me
i wish i couldnt hear
i wish i couldnt see
i wish this wasnt happening
i cant take this no more

who said fighting gets people closer?
the more they fight
the more they drift away
the more they cause pain

at this rate
four years
we'll all be strangers

what is a family?
my family...
is it really one?
as the days go by
the more they destroy each other
theyre more like enemies
fighting against each other to live

their yells and screams are like crashing waves
their actions and feelings are like broken glass
i dont know if this family
this family can be a whole again
its almost impossible
its like putting a glass cup back together
there are those tiny missing pieces
that let the water flow out
its those missing pieces
that wont put us back together again

im scared
money problems
its always there
its never going away
its more like its showing up more
family problems
it only increases
i dont know what to do
i dont think this family can take it anymore
im scared
scared for my life
people say it wont happen
but anything and everything is possible
just like death coming to you
life changes in a blink of an eye

tomorrow is a brand new day
a new day to show my smile to them
like nothing happened

please god...
help me lord
help my family in this time of need
its tearing not only me
but my whole family apart
lord, i dont think i can take this anymore
ive dealt with it for more than half my life
and it just gets worse
please god
my family members are getting weaker
theyre mentally and physically drained
but having me here
its weighing them down even more
please..
help me
help my family
lord

i dont know which side to stay on anymore
one side tells me this
another side tells me that
another side tells me this and that
another side tells me that and this
which side do i have to listen to?
which side...
i feel like im in the middle of a tug-a-war game