friend

the more i stand by and watch
the more i see theyre crumbling
theyre slowly deteriorating
the more i see theyre in much more pain than i am

yet i complain
but they dont they have smiles and is there for me
but what can i do in return?
i havent been the friend i should be
i should have been all ears
i should of been more worried about them

im scared
theyre slowly falling
and all im doing is watching

what kind of friend is that?
what have i become?
ive become the kind of friend
who doesnt listen, and just cares about herself
i havent been there for them

the pain, the suffering i dont know anything
and if i do, i didnt do any helping
i just listened and nodded
felt sad but didnt know how to express it
i wanted to give good advice
but none came out
i wanted to be there for them
but i wasnt even with them

i feel like im slowly tearing our friendship apart
i just look at their "bright" side
i dont know exactly what they are going through
yet they know what im going through

ive changed
ive become cold
ive become a bad friend
i hate it
i dont want to be cold
i dont want to be a bad friend
i want to go back
to the time where i was always there for them
or atleast when i fully understood
their hurt, their pain, their problems

i just wish i could be there for them
and give them the help they need
from me --their friend

im sorry